Prospector Pies & Sarge’s Smoke Shack Bar-B-Que

31 N. Wenatchee Avenue, Wenatchee, WA 98801

Saturday, April 20th, 2013 — 1 Comment »

I find myself in Wenatchee, WA from time to time for hockey tournaments.  I was in the middle of a really intense pie phase during my last stay, so naturally, I had to check this place out.  Here’s the burger menu – and check out their amazing website.

NOTE:  visiting their website is worth it for the auto-play theme song alone

As you can see from the menu, they have a bunch of different burgers to choose from – all served with seasoned fries.  You can also substitute for curly fries, a double order of fries, a cup of soup, or a mixed green  shredded iceburg salad for $.50 more.  I ordered the “Burger Special” (not sure why that is in quotes?) with American cheese, french fries, and a Diet Coke.  I also took the option to add on a slice of Strawberry Rhubarb pie for $1 more.  Menu description:

“Burger Special” – Sarge’s Famous Burger with fries & a pop.

I’m a big fan of any restaurant who actually uses the word ‘pop’ in their printed menu, so that was nice.  Unfortunately, the Diet Coke – served in a mason jar with a slice of lemon – was the best part of my meal.

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Killer Burger

4644 NE Sandy Boulevard Portland, OR 97213

Sunday, July 8th, 2012 — 2 Comments »

Killer Burger is one of those special places in this world that only sells burgers and fries.  They have about 10 different burgers to choose from, or you can create your own starting at $7.95.  Each burger includes a 1/3 lb “100% beef” patty and bacon by default.  All burgers also come with fries at no additional cost.  Killer Burger now has three locations, with the original being the NE Hollywood location.

Dream-Burger’s Official List of Annoyances with the Killer Burger Menu

  • “100% beef” patties – for being a restaurant that solely sells burgers, you’d think they’d give a bit more detail about the type of beef they use.
  • “Go Metro” – Killer Burger gives the consumer an option to switch, er, upgrade their beef patty to a Garden Burger for an additional $1.  I am clearly not a vegetarian/vegan, but I still think it’s kind of bizarre to phrase it this way. Also, if you’re a vegan or vegetarian, you will want to explicitly state this multiple times when ordering.  I’ve had two different experiences (at Sellwood and Hollywood) where someone I was with ordered a totally vegan burger and it 1.) came with the beef patty, but with no bacon and 2.) came with the garden burger, but had bacon.
  • “Girlie Size” – This, unfortunately, is the term to order your burger basket at 1/2 the portion.  I truly love that they give you the option to only order a half size, and more places should make this a standard offering, but this is totally negated by the feeling I get when actually ordering it.  Besides the ridiculous sexism here, it’s also fucking stupid to phrase what is actually a “normal” portion of food as “girlie sizing it” – but whatev.

Anyway.  I’ve eaten a ton of burgers here and they all have been delicious.  On this particular visit, I went with the following:

CLASSIC – Bacon, Cheese, Lettuce, Tomato, Smokey House Sauce, Grilled Onion, & Pickle $7.95

I ordered it “Normal Human Size” with no onion & took a seat at a grimy, crumb-and-grease-ridden table to wait for this gem to arrive:


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Hamburger Mary’s

19 NW 5th Avenue Portland, OR 97209

Wednesday, July 6th, 2011 — No Comments »

Hamburger Mary’s is a chain restaurant that currently has 12 locations throughout the US and has been around for 40 years.  Instead of providing actual background information, I’ll just paste the “details” section of a Google search for Hamburger Mary’s:

At a glance: drag shows – cascade aids project – cheese burger – bingo night – blue cheese

I went here on a Monday night when they were running a burger special – $6 for a “Mary Burger” w/ fries.  Menu description:

Mary Burger: Topped with Mary’s sauce, lettuce, pickles.  Add cheese/bacon, $1.25 each.

Though I ordered the standard burger with ground chuck, they also offer the following burger types:  Ahi Tuna, Black Bean, Kobe, Organic Free Range, Chicken Breast and Buffalo – so that’s nice.  My burger:

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Rogue Brew Pub & Eatery

31500 NW Commercial Street North Plains, Oregon 97133

Monday, June 6th, 2011 — No Comments »

First thing’s first:  this place has no connection with the “other” Rogue known around Portland

Intro, courtesy of their comic sans/.gif-filled websiteGreat food, microbrews, and music are waiting for you in historic downtown North Plains, just 19 miles west of Portland, Oregon. We use natural, fresh and local produce and meat in our food, and our rotating micro-brews can’t be beat. On Fridays, you’ll find some of Portland’s best musical talent playing in our intimate setting.

They have a full page of their menu dedicated to burgers, which all include chips and a pickle by default.  You can upgrade your side to french fries or onion rings for an additional fee.  I ordered the following:

The Rogue Cheeseburger – A 1/3 lb. ground beef patty on a grilled bun with cheese, lettuce, tomato, onion and mayonnaise.  $5.50

The wait was really short, which was great because I was absolutely starving.  Great timing, Rogue!

And an alternate image for all those who are into grainy low-definition color-corrected burger photos:

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Red Mill Burgers

1613 W Dravus Street Seattle, WA 98119

Monday, April 4th, 2011 — No Comments »

Red Mill Burgers has 2 locations in Seattle and seemingly a great deal of hype surrounding them.  Some samples:

-“One of the 20 Hamburgers You Must Eat Before You Die” – The Oprah Show

-Winner, “Best Burger in Seattle” –  Seattle Weekly, 10 years in a row

-Winner, “Best Onion Rings in the U.S.” – GQ Magazine

The Oprah quote alone was enough to make me put it on my list for my trip to Seattle.

I was pretty impressed with their menu board.  I like when restaurants actually show you the different sizes of sides and drinks, and they also included detailed descriptions of exactly what comes on each item.  I always feel like an ass when I request no onion by default and the cashier sassily replies “well, they don’t come with onion” and then I sigh quietly to myself and proceed with the transaction.

The burgers are 1/4 lb. flame-broiled patties.  I went with the deluxe with cheese and a side of onion rings:

Red Mill Deluxe w/ Cheese – American Cheese, Lettuce, Tomato, Pickle, Red Onion, Mill Sauce

The wait wasn’t bad given the amount of guests in the building for the lunch rush.  I also had a nice view of their kitchen, specifically a giant tower of bacon.  Please click the image below to view it in full size to truly appreciate the GIANT FUCKING TOWER OF BACON:

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Hoss’s Steak and Sea House

Wednesday, January 12th, 2011 — 1 Comment »

Hoss’s Steak and Sea House is a family restaurant chain with 38 locations in Pennsylvania and West Virginia.  There are two selling points of Hoss’s: the ruse of having a great steak, and the “fresh and wholesome” soup & salad bar – with homemade soups, just-baked breads, fresh-cut fruit, a bunch of desserts, and soft-serve ice cream. The latter point is pretty sweet.

Hoss’s is unique, as you order your food from a cashier the minute you walk in. I love this aspect.

After you order, the hostess will direct you to your table and you can immediately start eating, if you ordered the salad bar.

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Little Big Burger

122 NW 10th Avenue Portland, OR 97209

Thursday, December 30th, 2010 — 4 Comments »

Little Big Burger is an upscale burger joint in Portland, OR opened by Micah Camden (owner of Yakuza Lounge, Beast, and D.O.C) and is located between NW Couch and NW Davis.

The menu is limited to burgers & fries, a la In-N-Out, but also offers floats, beer, and a veggie burger option.  The burger description:

lbb burgers are made with a 1/4 lb. of cascade natural beef, local brioche buns, local cheeses, organic veggies, and camden’s catsup.

A cheeseburger will run you $3.75, with choices of cheeses being Cheddar, Chevre, Swiss, or Bleu.  You order at the counter, take note of your number on the receipt, and take a seat.  For seating, there is a long counter that faces the grill. It’s nice to pass the wait time by watching the cooks prepare your burger right in front of you.  The view from the counter:

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