Deschutes Brewery

210 NW 11th Avenue Portland, OR 97209

From their website,“The Portland Deschutes Brewery and Public House opened in Portland’s Pearl District in May 2008 and has become a destination for great beer, delicious food and a relaxed urban atmosphere. The pub’s design is similar to a Scottish pub, but with a distinct Northwest style that brings a taste of Central Oregon to the heart of Portland.”

They have a few burgers to choose from, and their menu boasts the following “Freshly-ground, hand-formed patties of Coleman Ranch’s naturally raised, hormone and antibiotic free, local beef.  Fed on Deschutes Brewery’s spent grain.”  Seems interesting enough. I went with the following:

Pub Burger – 1/3 Pound of Freshly-Ground and Hand-Formed Coleman Ranch Beef on a Fresh Brewery Baked Challah Bun with Mayo and a side of Lettuce, Onion, Tomato & Pickles.  – $10

The burgers are served with your choice of Brewery Fries, house salad, a cup of soup or Brewery Cole Slaw. I ordered the Pub Burger as is with a side of the house salad. The wait was rather long, but it was after normal dining hours so I was fine with it. However, I was not fine with what was brought out to me:

The first question that ran through my mind after seeing this plate was “Why is the patty shaped like a Dairy Queen Starkiss bar?

And the next question was “WHY WOULD ANYONE CHARGE $10 FOR THIS??”

I cannot think of any reason why, except to actively deter customers from ever saying anything good about your restaurant ever again. I will only assume that this was a one-off type deal, and hopefully if I ever decide to try this again it will be different.

Burger Ratings:

Burger: 1

A giant piece of plain tasteless bread plus a tiny (albeit fun-shaped) puck of burned beef is not a burger I want to eat.  It’s not even a burger I want to review.

Side: 6

Since my stomach was full of beer, I opted to get the lighter side option – the house salad. I’m usually pleased whenever I get a salad that isn’t 95% iceberg lettuce, so this was a real treat by those standards.

Environment: 6

The inside seemed like a giant warehouse, and I was pretty into it. Everything was clean and new and nice, and the place is huge. Definitely enjoyable to eat/drink here.

Value: 0

I can’t even give this a 1 because paying $10 for that plate is a crime.

Deschutes Brewery
210 NW 11th Avenue Portland, OR 97209
(503) 296.4906

Tags: deschutes brewery, mayonnaise lovers, NW, portland, starkiss patty

Listed Under: 3 - Disappointing