Hoss’s Steak and Sea House

Hoss’s Steak and Sea House is a family restaurant chain with 38 locations in Pennsylvania and West Virginia.  There are two selling points of Hoss’s: the ruse of having a great steak, and the “fresh and wholesome” soup & salad bar – with homemade soups, just-baked breads, fresh-cut fruit, a bunch of desserts, and soft-serve ice cream. The latter point is pretty sweet.

Hoss’s is unique, as you order your food from a cashier the minute you walk in. I love this aspect.

After you order, the hostess will direct you to your table and you can immediately start eating, if you ordered the salad bar.

Menu description for Hoss’s “Handcrafted Sirloin Burgers”:

Willie Burger

Lettuce, tomato, onion, and pickle. Add cheese and bacon 1.00

1/3 lb. 4.99 | 1/2 lb. 5.99

All sandwiches and burgers come with fries, but you have the option of selecting another potato-based product for $0.99.  I ordered the 1/3 lb. Willie Burger with American cheese, fries,  and the salad bar for an additional $3.49.

Wait time was too short as I only had enough time to take one trip to the salad bar.

***SPECIAL DREAM-BURGER DUAL BURGER REVIEW****************************

*****STARRING*****(LITERALLY IF YOU EVER CALL AN ASTERISK A STAR**********

***********JONA DUMBLETON********************************************

My burger:

Jona’s burger:

My first salad bar plate:

Jona’s:

Burger Ratings:

Burger:

Ashley 4:  The burger at Hoss’s was a bit disappointing for me. Maybe it’s because I haven’t actually eaten at a Hoss’s in years, and maybe the fact that having “Steak” in a restaurants name makes me subconsciously set a higher standard for a burger, but for whatever reason – this burger just didn’t cut the mustard. In fact, there wasn’t even any mustard on the thing! 4!

Jona 6: Hoss’s beef has a unique quality- a quality, which I love.  It has the best strangest taste I have ever encountered.  Like it is definitely beef, I am not sure if it’s a marinade or a rub or what, but I love it.  It reminds me of getting all A’s on my report card and going to Hoss’s for a treat.  Honestly this is the sort of burger that transcends cooking preferences, you don’t even care.  I added American cheese, because again no need to get fancy here.  I also just added ketchup because this is a child-like experience for me, and I am not trying to be sophisticated.  It’s a good burger.  Hoss’s beef flavor shines through.  I mean the Willie Burger is not taste I think about for a while, but while I’m eating I think this was a good choice, I am satisfied.  It’s on a corn-toasted bun, which is cool because I like to incorporate corn into my diet as much as possible.  Hoss’s doesn’t necessarily outdo itself, but its does what you’ve always known it to do, and pretty well.

Side:

Ashley 10: You cannot rate the side option at Hoss’s any lower than a 10.  I don’t really feel comfortable giving it a mere ’10′ as a rating, but I am because if I don’t keep it within the given limiations – THINGS ARE JUST GOING TO GET CRAZY, MUCH LIKE THE BUFFET OFFERINGS AT HOSS’S! The buffet is so great, that despite the fries being soggy and mostly unremarkable, I am still giving this a 10.

Jona 10:  Beyond the endless soup, salad, snack, and desert bar, Hoss’s does a crazy job with a potato.  The fries are a steak variety and I’m fairly certain frozen, but I don’t even mess with these.  I go straight baked potato.  They are so good here.  They are never cold, or hard and are just salty and fluffy enough.  The salad bar has so many choices, and in my case too many.  Goldfish crackers, spinach, pickled eggs, raisins, and sunflower seeds drowned in French is horrible. This is my fault.  MY FAULT.  I made this mess, but I don’t have to deal with it.  I could have easily picked up another salad, but our food came, which I am sure is a money saving tactic. The cinnamon bread rules, and has a squirt bottle of extra icing, what all NWPA diners expect.  They also have pretty good soups, my favorite being French onion with add your own cheese option.  The salad bar has nachos which is a nice touch.  The soft serve smorgasbord is untouchable and what I usually think of first when I go to Hoss’s.

Environment:

Ashley 2: Poor man’s Applebees.

Jona 1:  Hoss’s environment is actually nice, this is a spite rating.  The Hoss’s in question replaced the best Hoss’s ever with several weird rooms, a taxidermied bear, 100 oil industry artifacts, and a working fireplace. This is why I hate this new Hoss’s. Its a vanilla bastardization of what used to be the most magical place on earth.  One of my dining companions remarked that the bathrooms were beautiful, so there’s that. Maybe they designed it to more senior friendly or something.  Its closer to the new hospital and the mall. WHATEVER.

Value:

Ashley 9: The value is pretty amazing at Hoss’s.  Here’s a summary of every visit:  You arrive hungry, are pumped up you can place your order as soon as you enter so it arrives quicker (making sure you opt for the ~UNLIMITED SALAD BAR~), eye up the salad bar as you are taken to your seat & mentally devise a basic game plan of what you’re going to get, sit down(and by that I mean place your coat on the chair and immediately dash to the salad bar before sitting), waltz (or dash) over to the salad bar and START LOADIN’ UP.  I’ll take a quick break here to cite an improvement before I continue: Hoss’s, I think you should offer “Loadin’ Carts” to tables of 4 or more. This way everyone can take 2 plates of food from your salad bar as well as a soup or additional plate, place it on the cart, and wheel it back to the table. This will decrease foot traffic (reducing collisions & spills) and improve customer satisfaction. As you completely fill up your first plate, you toy with the idea of bringing the plate back to the table and starting up with another one, but you decide to just keep piling food vertically onto the same plate because you are lazy. Once you get back to your seat, you realize you created a fucking mess and regret how bad you fucked up, cause now you have a ton of food that’s all combining flavors and you’re going to look like such an ass if you waste it all. Right as you start to feel full, your entree arrives. You start eating and eventually reach a point where you have to stop and tell yourself “I can do this.” and then finish your entree.  You are absolutely stuffed at this point, but head back up to the buffet to get ice cream anyway. Maybe even two servings (Vanilla AND Strawberry? FUCK YEAH) with different toppings. After you eat this, you are miserably full and regret ever coming here. And then after a bit, as you’re heading out the door you think to yourself – “I could have had another plate..”

Jona 8: I honestly am not sure how much this cost, as I was at a family function and did not pay.  Hoss’s is never expensive and for lunch run some 99cent burger with salad bar purchase. The amount of food you can eat here for round abouts 10$ should be criminal.  Also free after dinner mints!

Hoss's Steak & Sea House //2432 State Route 257 Cranberry, PA 16319 // (814)677.3002

Tags: buffets, chain restaurants, DREAM-BURGER DUAL REVIEWS

Listed Under: 7 - Real Good